Messianic Jew tells how she decided to believe in Jesus
I was born in Israel and my family was not religious, but was more traditional to a certain extent. I always remember the Sabbath and holidays, the synagogue and the Kidush. Everything was nice and pleasant. After high school graduation I joined the army and of course I had a boyfriend. Our relationship was very close and my wish was to marry him, which never happened. We finished our relationship and it was hard for me to function without tranquilizers.
One day, I was afraid to become addicted to the pills and God (whom I always believed) guided me to stop taking the pills and start reading the Bible. I started reading from Genesis Chapter 1 and soon felt the need to continue to read it all. It took me more than one year reading all the bible, then I started to think in the direction of the New Testament. I found in the library a small worn book of the New Testament (I learned later that it was my father that hid it somewhere in the library), I started reading in secret and when I had finished, I felt that I understood nothing, except for one thing that the name of Jesus in Hebrew is Yeshua and not Yeshu and that he is a Jew. How come half of the world believes in him? I had many questions but no answers
One day I had some problems and I asked God to help me, I did not get immediate help so I went to that “Jesus” and then I felt as if I sinned and was heretical. My birthday arrived, and I received from my sisters a biography of the British singer Cliff Richard in which he tells about himself and his faith in Christ, I did not understand many things but at the end of the book there was the address of someone in England that one can write him and ask questions. I wrote a letter and I told about myself, I received an encouraging response that I am in the best way and that someone should come to Israel and will contact me, and so it was, I met with the person with other “believers” (I did not understand exactly what it is at that time), I thought it was going to be just an evening of fun but it was a “meeting” and I was surprised by the whole thing and did not understand what it was.
This person returned to England and on the same time I found a flyer in the mailbox from Haifa school of Emmaus that offers Bible study by mail for free. Who does not want something that is free? I signed up for the course and started to learn. Those believers I visited with the man from England invited me to come with them Messianic congregation and to participate in meetings. Slowly I began to understand what the whole thing was about. One day when I was at the meeting I thought to myself why do I really need all of this and this burden of meetings, I can believe it, but do not need to attend the meetings. So I stopped going to the meetings
I met a new boyfriend, had a great love, we moved along in a rented apartment, had wonderful life, I thought to myself how much better it is to live with a friend and have fun and also believe. It seemed to me as a great combination which I liked and I did not feel I was sinning, but there was a certain emptiness inside me which I ignored. As beautiful above life were, I was asked by the teacher from a school in Emmaus If I would be interested to be in touch with a believer, I did not refuse and he contacted me with Rebecca. I met her and she invited me to participate in meetings in her congregation, I politely refused, but she did not let go and I continued to avoid her.
One night I listened to the songs of Cliff Richard and among them was the song “Why Me” a song that speaks of faith and God, etc., lyrics of the song spoke to me and I knew that God holds out his hands and if I refuse to take them – it’s too late. I left behind my life of sin, said goodbye to the boyfriend, I left the apartment and when Rebecca offered me to come to her congregation again – I agreed. I came to the meeting and I immediately felt that I was in the “family.” Later it became clear to me that during all that time the congregation prayed for me without even knowing meExactly a year later I was baptized and have come to believe. Since then my life has changed for the better, the Lord is with me always, God loves me and I thank him every day for all his mercies